Here in America, where individualism is the true national religion, we demand the freedom to be different and then work tirelessly to get everyone to follow suit. We fight for our right to be uniquely homogenous, and fight legislation that allows anyone to be different than what we’ve collectively decided…
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The Calculus of Cruelty
I never understood the calculus of being cruel. Could never grasp the return on the investment of time and energy. It always seemed like you really had to go above and beyond what was worth one’s time. Had to go out of your way to be unjustifiably cruel. Greed might…
An Eye For An Eye
There is a long history of anti-semitism in America. One particularly prevalent, and openly racist accusation, was that Jewish people were somehow questionably loyal to America (or wherever they lived) because of a presumed overriding loyalty to Israel. They weren’t “real” Americans, as their loyalty couldn’t be trusted. This has…
Fingerpainting
We lose our nerve as we age, there is no getting around it. Not you, you say. Maybe so. Momentum is a wonderful thing and if you’re already moving, it’s not so hard to keep it going. If you’re a hardcore traveler and you just keep traveling, it’s probably easier…
The Not So Great Outdoors
When I think of my favorite writers, I don’t spend a lot of time imagining them outside. Some of my favorite writers, and comedians, seem to be more of what Jim Gaffigan calls “indoorsy.” I think of David Sedaris, Calvin Trillin, Jerry Seinfeld, Bill Bryson, Malcolm Gladwell, and Anne Lamott…
Teach Your Children Well
The problem I have with the elf on your shelf is that it is a blatant attempt to teach children to be good, when I think the central message of Christianity, and therefore presumably the message of Christmas, is to be kind. Be kind. That’s the message of love that…
What’s So Funny About Peace, Love And Understanding?
When we are young, we look forward to holidays with unbridled excitement because they are so full of possibility. But as we age, we turn our attention to the past, to memories of a life already spent. We wax poetic about ancient meals, and conversations with people no longer living.…
My Fighting Weight In Scarves
I don’t know if I’ll ever get back to a point where I think I look better unclothed than I do clothed. For all intents and purposes that ship has sailed and probably didn’t set off anytime recently either. It was probably somewhere around my mid-twenties and even then I…
Daylight Fading
Autumn is a smell: woodsmoke, decaying leaves, and cinnamon. It’s a color palette too: oranges, reds, and browns. The color of the earth on fire. The air has an entirely different quality, with a crisp snap in your nose and the way the low light glows now rather than shimmers,…
Ahhh, That’s Better
It’s a story that’s been told and told again in our family. I think we tell it because it so accurately reflects who we are as a people in a way that trying to describe our little clan could never do. It’s a symbol of our love, arrogance, ego and…