Nostalgia (n). 1. A sentimental longing or wistful affection for the past, typically for a period or place with happy personal associations. When looking through old photographs, we often say things like, “Look at this picture of me from when I was younger.” But as my wife would tell you,…
A Fire In The Fireplace
My wife Jane thinks it’s silly to talk about having a fire in the fireplace. “Where else would you light a fire? The sink?” she’ll say. I guess she has a point, but it sounds strange to simply say, “I think I’ll start a fire” then walk into the other…
Nathaniel Rateliff and the Night Sweats
Nathaniel Rateliff and the Night Sweats. It was the second time I’d heard the song, but the first time I didn’t look up who it was. I was on my way to get a haircut in my rental car, so I was listening to the old-fashioned radio instead of satellite.…
It’s Scarf Season Motherfuckers
It’s scarf season motherfuckers. That’s right. I’m breaking out my scarves and there’s nothing you can do about it. Black ones, grey ones, yellow ones. Linen, wool, cotton. Long, wide, frayed, infinite loop, keffiyeh. I’ve got em all. And yet, I just bought two more. I’ve always said that fat…
I Don’t Do Cards
I don’t do cards. Not for birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, baptisms, funerals or Christmas. Never did. I don’t believe in them. In 1996 I met a woman who didn’t believe in cards either. We were married a year later. I’m not saying that was the only reason, but certainly a contributing…
Your Self Involvement Is Intruding On My Narcissism
I can’t stand people who only talk about themselves. Why should I be concerned about your life, your kids, your needs, your fears, when I have so many other issues to be annoyed by? It’s a little selfish if you ask me. I don’t want to offend anyone, but seriously,…
The Responsibility of Free Speech
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. These forty-five words encompass the…
Sunday Is My Favorite Day Again
The world will break your heart ten ways to Sunday. That’s guaranteed. I can’t begin to explain that. Or the craziness inside myself and everyone else. But guess what? Sunday’s my favorite day again. I think of what everyone did for me, and I feel like a very lucky guy.…
An Inside Guy
I’m an inside guy. I like being inside. Everyone wants me to go outside—especially my wife. But almost everything I want to do is inside. Inside is nice. It’s warm in the winter, and cool in the summer. I have wireless, my computer, my books, a nice chair, ice, alcohol.…
You People Are Pissing Me Off
I’m sure that should just be the title of my blog. You People Are Pissing Me Off. Also, the title of my autobiography and the inscription on my tombstone, two things my father likes to point out when faced with an undeniable self-truth: “That should be the title of your…