An ongoing series of things I would like to do, but most likely won’t, so I have decided that these would be good things to write about.
6. Produce A Play
The stage setup would be fairly stark, a minimalistic expression of the world. It won’t really matter, because no one will remember much about the staging once the actors appear. Tom Waits, Sam Shepherd and Sam Elliot. Shepherd is dead and he’s irreplaceable so I’m going to substitute Nick Offerman. The gravitas of these three voices are their own character, but would contrast nicely with the frivolity of the dialogue which would be delivered in all seriousness but which would emphasize the absurdity of life.
Each actor would tell a different story, one for each act, and would be performed live in front of an audience, but would be filmed cinematically with multiple cameras on multiple evenings to produce a film.
7. Publish a small town newspaper
When I say small town, I’m not fucking around. Like someplace under 2,000 people total. A place where town is a few hundred people and everyone else lives out there somewhere. I don’t want to cover the news the way one normally would. I would be more like a Hunter S. Thompson type, who would write fanatical accounts of mundane civic events and preposterous profiles of local legends. I still haven’t ruled out doing this here in Goshen. I might try it for awhile, but I don’t know if Goshen is remote enough to accept my level of eccentricity.
On the other hand, writing a novel as a series of newspaper articles about the characters of a small town sounds like fun.
8. Write a novel while living in Cuba
I don’t have to live there forever but I might. Maybe just a year or two. I’d write in the morning and paint in the afternoon, at least if I felt like painting after my boozy lunch, which wouldn’t be very often. The painting, that is, I assume the boozy lunch would be the rule. I don’t like to fish and there isn’t much else to do. I would have friends that would invite me for dinner or to hear live music, but I wouldn’t be much of a late night person. I’d be up early to drink strong coffee and write. Three or four strong hours in the morning is plenty.
9. Cover a minor league baseball team as a journalist
This isn’t a full time job so I would need another means of income. I’m thinking the most likely scenario would involve writing commercially, which as we know can be done anywhere, and living in whatever backwater small town the teams exists in. I’d also consider changing it to hockey team in a small town in Canada, which I might as well combine with the newspaper job.